Deep state black shirts coming for your gas stove, and may confiscate your gunsby Hal BrownBelow was the less dramatic image I created for the story earlier this morning. The one I ended up using is meant to reflect that fact, with a bit of exaggeration, that an astounding story on The Washington Post's Wonkblog site revealed that the average number of firearms owned by a "typical gun-owning household" had roughly doubled between 1994 and 2013, to 8.1 guns per household. The trend has only gone up since. (from The Fool)
Bellow is the comment I made to Alexandra Petri's Washington Post satirical OpED.
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The Republicans attempt to conflate their fear mongering over heavily armed Deep State Black-shirts breaking down your door to haul off your gas stove with them doing the same thing to take your stash of pistols and assault rifles is both ludicrous and is pathetic in that it is apparently t-shirt slogan worthy an issue now.
Rep. Matt Gaetz (R-Fla.) brilliantly tried to enflame the paranoia of gun owners when he said his gas stove would have to be torn from his “cold dead hands.”
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Petri writes from the point of view of being a gas stove:
Hi, I’m a stove. What kind of stove? Don’t worry about it. I already told you what kind of stove I was. You remember, when you were sautéing on me. Your poor, fragile mind, stressed with so many things! Thank goodness you have me here, to take care of you and keep you safe.
Petri is a self-described punster:
Gaslighting isn't the only pun that can be applied to this dangerous attempt of the deep state to take over the lives of God-fearing patriotic white Americans. Consider Petri's gas stove's final words:
What kind of stove am I? What am I lit with? Listen, I am the best kind of stove. Don’t worry about me. Worry that they will come and take me from you, if you aren’t careful. “Even if they were considering a ban, that wouldn’t be how bans work?” Oh, sweetheart, do you hear yourself? I’m worried for you. You must be burned out. Maybe you should get some fresh air, for reasons unrelated to my presence in your kitchen. Just forget everything you know about how regulations and bans work and listen to the sound of me, your stove.
I’ll say it one more time: There is literally no reason to be concerned that you have me in your home. Nobody should look into this any further.
Look at my flames. There they are, flickering, just as bright as you remember.
She just as easily could be speaking as if she was an AR-15.
Hi, I’m a gun. What kind of gun (new link)? Don’t worry about it. I already told you what kind of gun I was. You remember, when you were shooting me. Your poor, fragile metal mind, stressed with so many things! Thank goodness you have me here, to take care of you and keep you safe.
and
What kind of gun am I? What am I loaded with? Listen, I am the best kind of gun. Don’t worry about me. Worry that they will come and take me from you, if you aren’t careful. “Even if they were considering a ban, that wouldn’t be how bans work?”
Oh, sweetheart, do you hear yourself? I’m worried for you. You must be blasted out. Maybe you should get some fresh air, for reasons unrelated to my presence in your bedroom. Just forget everything you know about how regulations and bans work and listen to the sound of me, your AR-15.
I’ll say it one more time: There is literally no reason to be concerned that you have me in your home.
Nobody should look into this any further.
Look at my shots. There they are, explosive, just as bright and loud as you remember.
Here's an excerpt from this Wired article The Gas Stove Culture Wars Have Begun:
A NEW WAY to show your political affiliation may be emerging, and it’s close to home. So close, you’ll find it in your kitchen.
A debate over gas stoves reignited this week and fell along ideological lines in the US: As researchers, regulators, and Democratic politicians are pointing out the problematic emissions from gas appliances, conservatives are asserting their rights to cook how they choose. Things are, well, heating up quickly, as they do on a gas range: “If the maniacs in the White House come for my stove, they can pry it from my cold dead hands. COME AND TAKE IT!!” Congressman Ronny Jackson, from Texas, told Twitter. Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez from New York clapped back: “Did you know that ongoing exposure to NO2 from gas stoves is linked to reduced cognitive performance[?]”
Much like the divide over electric cars—US president Joe Biden has pushed the new electric options, but some Republicans cite them as costly and inconvenient—the stove finds itself at the center of a culture war. People have very strong feelings about the roaring flame of their gas stoves and enjoy their cooking speed and precision. For Republicans, it’s another issue to pick at as they tear apart Biden’s climate agenda and paint policies as government overreach.
Addendum:
This is my Twitter tweet shown below with related hashtags.
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