Why the f*ck is Musk advertising Starlink on Salon? By Hal M. Brown If he was trying to troll me, I took the bait.

 

The best website to read my essays on is Substack, here.

I was reading “There's more film and television for you to watch than ever before — good luck finding it” on Salon and found it jarring to see the ad shown above for Starlink, one of Elon Musk’s companies. It popped up, literally popped up onto my laptop screen as it replaced another ad.

The ad was on the side so as you read down the article it remained there, but it also was between sections in the article.

I looked at several other articles but it seemed to be only on the one about streaming video.

Regardless of whether it was elsewhere in Salon I wondered who in their marketing department thought readers of this progressive anti-Trump and anti-Musk website would be in the market for Starlink, let alone click on it the ad to learn more about it.

They managed to sucker a click from me because I was curious about it and thought it might be a good topic for a Substack if I couldn’t think of anything else.

This is what the the first parts of the website look like. Here’s the first page I saw when I clicked. (You can enlarge the following images by clicking on them.)

Then scrolling down:

The Starlink device works because Musk, as of April 2025, had 7,135 Starlink satellites in orbit, with 7,105 of them operational. SpaceX plans to deploy a total of up to 42,000 satellites in the future. (Reference Wikipedia) For it to function you have to point the device at the sky.

“Streaming, video calls, online gaming, remote working and more are now possible in even the most remote locations thanks to the world’s most advanced internet system.”

Here are two more:

I won’t add more screen grabs since the photo of the cybertruck is a good one to end on. If someone thinks the cybertruck is the cat’s meow in aesthetic design maybe they will be the type of person who wants to buy Starlink. If you want to see the rest of the website you will have to give it a click here.

This is marketing aimed at a domestic American market for use while doing things like camping or traveling, not for Ukrainians using it to communicate vital military information. 

I can speculate that Musk, assuming he is involved in this advertising initiative, figures it is worth it to see if there are enough MAGAs willing to spend a premium for the kind of internet connectivity it provides. I seriously doubt a non-MAGA would want to do anything to add to Musk’s wealth.

I don’t know whether or not anyone realized that putting an ad on Salon was akin to advertising salmonella in a supermarket commercial. It is quite possible that nobody considered who would see the ad and that an algorithm search for website articles about streaming video. The word streaming appears 23 times in this story, including in the subtitle. 

With Starlink you can watch streaming video in the wilderness.

It makes for a better story if I assume that Musk himself approved the ad in Salon as a way of trolling us liberals. That would make sense if he’s into such marketing minutiae. If this is the case, he reeled me in. 

Consider me trolled.

Thanks for reading my Substack! Subscribe for free to receive new posts by email.

This post is public so feel free to share it.

Share

Recommended:

Read previous Substacks.

Recent:

Wordsmitng: Here are some good lines from a Brian Karem Salon article

 By Hal Brown

I enjoy reading excellent wordsmthing and hope that at times I come up with a clever turn of phrase that conveys an idea in a particularly succinct and snarky way. I appreciate it when others do this. For example here are my favorite lines fron the Brian Karem article shown above:

In Florida, in one of the most insidious moves ever made by any legislature since the end of the Civil War, new laws demand that school children be taught that there were benefits to slavery. You know, skills. 𝐀𝐬 𝐢𝐟 𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐚𝐧 𝐞𝐱𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐝𝐞 𝐬𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐥 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐫𝐨𝐨𝐦 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐛𝐨𝐚𝐫𝐝.

Then there are Kevin McCarthy, Lauren Boebert, Marjorie Taylor Greene, Jim Jordan and the usual gang of idiots, now including Rep. James Comer of Kentucky, who want to impeach Joe Biden without any evidence to justify it. 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐞 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐥 𝐟𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬.

. It's enough to make the hair dye run down his face. "𝐈𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐥 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐚𝐬 𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐚𝐬 𝐆𝐢𝐮𝐥𝐢𝐚𝐧𝐢, 𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐥 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐛𝐞 𝐞𝐦𝐩𝐭𝐲," Eisen explained on the podcast "Just Ask the Question."

from

Donald Trump unleashed a war against the U.S. government — and now he can't control it

I liked this paraphraph I wrote from yesterday's blog:

If Trump gets reelected we will see his most extreme pathological impulses powered by the rocket fuel of the presidency. He'll be a guided nuclear missile with mutilple warheads aimed at American democracy. He already has his targets selected and has a plan for turning the United Staes into a dictatorship where he can destroy his enemies on a whim.

Not being boring is the Trump and DeSantis challenge, but are they about to jump the shark?

 By Hal Brown

Read my related Mar. 15 blog here.

My version

I read this in Salon...

The real image

Double duds: Jim Jordan's and Tucker Carlson's lazy conspiracy theories bore MAGA

GOP propagandists believe MAGA buys whatever they're selling, so why put any effort into spinning lies?

... and I thought that the article could just as easily be referring to both Donald Trump and Ron DeSantis. You can see how I changed the illustration.

Just about everything that Amanda Marcotte writes in her article about Jim Jordan and Tucker Carlson, with some modification, could describe what might happen with Trump and DeSantis. 

Jumping the shark (see Wikipedia) of course originated with an episode of the popular TV show "Happy Days" where Fonzie was on water skis and jumped over a shark. After that the popularity of the series gradually declined but the term has expanded to mean a stunt meant to be a wowza which turns out to have been be a dud.

Consider how Trump is now hysterically warning that only he is capable of preventing World War III. DeSantis wants you to wet yourself in terror at the woke warriors who want to turn your children into "perverts".

Marcotte calls Jordan and Tucker's conspiracy theories lazy. I'd call them desperate. As far as I'm concerned the same goes for Trump and DeSantis. 

Jordan and Tucker are actors. This is from Marcotte's article (emphasis added):

Both Carlson and Jordan have become famous and powerful by dint of their effectiveness at spreading conspiracy theories. Carlson gets paid $6 million a year, strictly due to his acting chops, whether he's pretending to care about the sexiness of M&Ms or to believe in the intelligence of Donald Trump. Similarly, Jordan rose high in the ranks of House Republicans because he's talented at faking outrage. Yet both these men are showing less passion for conspiracy theories these days than your average unpaid and anonymous QAnon troll. It must be tiring, looking forward to the rest of their lives spent trying to feign zeal over fake culture war fights or made-up controversies. Not that they deserve your pity, of course. Being professional liars is the path they chose for themselves, and they're clearly stuck following it to the end. 

Not that I have to point out the obvious, but Trump and DeSantis are professional liars.

Their political fortunes depend on keeping their lying fresh and entertaining. Here's the 30 Second World War III possible shark jumper from Trump tweeted by Junior.

  Here's a slightly longer version of Trump warning that only he can prevent World War III.

Here's the longer video of Trump's warning. Ask yourself whether this could be looked back at him having jumped the shark.

I don't have a comparable example from Ron DeSantis. The one thing he has in his advantage is that he always comes across as dull. 

This is from The Washington Post opinion piece How much does charisma matter? DeSantis is putting it to the test. by Paul Waldman published today: 

He is “reserved and dry” and has a challenge “forging connections with people.” He’s “pinched and humorless.” He “just doesn’t have the charisma to command a national political stage.” He “has the charisma of a pair of cargo shorts.”

He wisely doesn't try to out-Trump Trump in feigning outrage. He depends on using a dry presentation of the dire consequences of woke policies. I don't know what latest policy announcement could, in retrospect, be seen as him having jumped the shark. I expect it could just the a straw the breaks the camels back executive order.

Both of the top contenders for the GOP nomination depend on not being boring. They are very different in this respect from Mike Pence and Joe Biden. Both of them are naturally low-key. You could call them boring in how they present their ideas and policies. When Biden is particularly animated, or expresses anger, more than usual people take notice, for example:

Click above to read article

Neither Pence nor Biden have to worry about boring MAGA-world since residents of this land of won't vote for them anyway. It's Trump and DeSantis who have to worry about boring the denizens of MAGA.

Addendum

I was curious about this...

so I looked it up:

Click above to read article

Trump can try to gin up hysteria about a nuclear attack but does he really care about the rest of Americans when his house has three bomb shelters? None can withstand a direct hit but why would Putin want to take out Mar-a-Lago when Trump is his pal?

Please scroll down to the comments link and let readers know what you think. Sharing on social media, also through the links below, is appreciated.

Salon's Brian Karem's best line: "...extreme members of Congress, with their cocaine eyes and speed-freak jive..."

 By Hal Brown

Photo is from "Cocaine Eyes: How Cocaine Effects Your Eyes" on Addiction Resource.

I am always on the lookout for writers I'd call snarky wordsmiths. They not only have a lot of original thoughts to express but they convey them in compelling, often snarky and clever ways. They often come up with an original turn of phrase which really grabs me as describing an individual or group in a way I'd say was deliciously nasty. 

I think Salon has some of the best wordsmiths of this ilk. Heather "Digby" Parton and Amanda Marcotte are two of my favorites. (You can see their columns at the links.) I also particularly like Washington Post columnist Dana Milbank. 

I am not meaning to suggest that there aren't superb writers posting online descriptions of people like, for example, Frank Bruni's of Ron DeSantis in The NY Times:

It brings me no joy to make those observations. It gives me the willies. I’m rooting hard against DeSantis, a flamboyantly divisive and transcendently smug operator with the chilling grandiosity to cast his political ascent as God’s will and a rapacity for power that’s one of the best arguments against giving it to him.

I am referring to the particularly powerful but also sarcastic, sardonic, and satirical ones.

Brian Karem (all columns) is another wordsmith like this who I admire. 

Here he is on Twitter:

He is also on Mastodon where I follow him:

He has some really good descriptions in his essay today:

We went nuts over a balloon! Thank you for saving us, Rihanna

If I had to select one description from his essay which I thought was his best it is this:

... extreme members of Congress, with their cocaine eyes and speed-freak jive...

This struck me as a great way to describe the GOP zealots in Congress even though I wasn't sure whether cocaine eyes were those with tiny or enlarged pupils. I looked up the term (here):

The photo in the lower right is of a cocaine eye.

I assumed that I knew what "speed-freak jive" was, but I figured I'd look it up since I was writing this blog. I discovered it really was a "thing" in pop culture and more than just someone speaking very rapidly and incoherently.

Click above to enlarge. This is a web search on DuckDuckGo.

It is in the lyrics to The Rolling Stones' song Can't You Hear Me Knocking:

Yeah, you got satin shoes
Yeah, you got plastic boots
Y'all got cocaine eyes
Yeah, you got speed-freak jive, now

Note that both cocaine eyes and speed-freak jive used together comes from this song. Brian will have to respond to me on Twitter or Mastadon to confirm this is where he got the idea to use it in his essay.

Musician Howling Waters has a song with that title. You can watch the video here.

Other parts of the Karem essay I particularly liked in addition to the main message which is conveyed in the subtitle about the balloon hysteria that:

It ought to be a "teachable moment": This country is deeply unhinged.

It is possible to be sidetracked by the clever jabs. What he is saying is very important.

Follows are some excerpts that grabbed me:

Millions of people jumped to conclusions, declared themselves experts in downing high-altitude balloons or were too quick to blame Joe Biden for an overblown crisis that would've made a great plot point in "Seinfeld." It was like accidentally tossing a Junior Mint into an open incision during an operation. (Of course people not familiar with that episode wouldn't appreciate this.)

and... 

Speaking of Ron DeSantis, that's why many people speculate he will upend Donald Trump and claim the GOP nomination in 2024. In other words, some are betting Ron DeSantis is the flatulence that is actually a bowel movement. He keeps smelling bad and won't go away, rather like Trump, but he's a fresher squeeze of the cheeks.

I like his describing Nikki Haley this way:

Nikki Haley has now tossed her political Medusa tentacles...

He also wrote about her:

She has a better chance of shooting down a high-altitude balloon with a Daisy Red Ryder BB gun...

I'd add to that reference that it is probably an homage to the line in the classic movie "A Christmas Story" when Ralphie says he was this BB gun for Christmas and is told he'll shoot his eye out with it if he has one.

Read more about this here.

When I read creative clever wordsmiths like these I wonder why I even try to write my blog.

Below: Please comment and share on social media.